About a Girl
by something-like-love
Summary: [written for the 1character challenge on LiveJournal] 50 sentences about Ariana Dumbledore. Her life, death, triumphs, failures, loves, losses, and everything in between.


**Diclaimer: **Not my universe.

**Author's Note: **I've been working on this off and on for about three weeks. You'd think writing fifty sentence would be easier. But I'm quite proud of it, and would love to know what you think.

(Also, so as to avoid confusion- in my mind, Ariana called Albus "Al" and Aberforth "Abe", which is how I refer to them here. Just so no one is like, "Who _is _that...?")

* * *

_#01 - Snow_

Mama told her stories about how it snowed the day she was born, thick and white across the windows of St. Mungo's, and how she had hoped for a baby girl after two precious boys; the snow granted her wish, and ever since snow was sacred to Mama.

_#02 - Child_

Her very favorite nightgown was several years old and more than a little tight across her chest, but she wore it anyway - after all, why was it that Al and Abe's chests stayed the same, while hers grew? - though for some reason when she wore it while Gellert was visiting, her brother's jaws dropped and they made her go change.

_#03 - Brick_

There was something in her mind blocking her memories, but she couldn't figure out what; a large brick wall, perhaps, that kept her not only from her memories but from her ordinary thoughts.

_#04 - Judgment_

They're leaving Mould-on-the-Wold, with Al and Abe taking turns packing so that one of them can watch her as she sits outside - when it was Al's turn earlier, a boy from across the road looked at her and laughed at Al, but all she was doing was trying to get her mouth to work again, so she doesn't understand why the boy asks if her brother is an idiot too.

_#05 - Powder_

Daddy is gone, he's been gone such a very long time, and the face powder that Mama used to wear that he loved, the one that smelt of raspberries - she doesn't wear it anymore.

_#06 - Grim_

Mama is peering at her, deep blue eyes wide with worry and fear, something she's not used to seeing in those comforting eyes; Mama asks if she's okay, and she tries to say "I hurt" but it's like the string connecting in mind to her mouth has broken, and all she can manage is a small whimper; Mama has never looked so grim before.

_#07 - Trap_

Dear Godric, her head hurts, so badly she wants to scream - why can't Mama make it better, why is Daddy leaving, why does she feel so trapped?

_#08 - Star_

Every night she recites the rhyme that Daddy taught her - _star light, star bright, first star I see tonight; I wish I may, I wish I might, have the wish I wish tonight _- and wonders if the stars love her enough to grant her wishes.

_#09 - Possession_

Mama tried to cut her hair once, with sharp edged scissors, but she screamed and wouldn't let her; now her locks are waist length, and even though Abe and Al go through her closet to pick out her clothes and rifle through her wardrobe for undergarments, her hair is the only thing that's really _hers, _so she hangs on tight.

_#10 - Bandage_

Her father is holding her wrapped tight in his arms, but she doesn't feel it- all she feels is a dull pounding in her ears, and she can't seem to make her eyes focus right, but somehow she hopes that Mama can give her a bandage and her head will feel right again, so that terrible sense of being trapped inside will go away.

_#11 - Pearl_

They've put Mama into the ground and she doesn't know why, Mama is just sleeping, but somehow she knows it's different than sleep, because Mama never wears her pearl broach except on very special days, so why is it pinned to her dress as they lower her into the dirt?

_#12 - Glass_

Al's friend Gellert came to visit today, and he smiled at her and told her she looked lovely - later she peered into the looking glass and couldn't find anything too lovely, but decided that she liked Gellert for saying so.

_#13 - Classified_

It's like she's a classified object - Mama doesn't let her out except at night, so no one can see her, and when she asks why with her short words and clipped voice, Mama turns away and doesn't answer.

_#14 - Buttons_

Dear Lord, she hates heat, it's the one thing she can't stand in the entire world - but, of course, Al and Abe get upset when she leaves the buttons of her nightgown undone in the summertime, and they say it's not proper; really, how can she think about proper in the heat?

_#15 - Closet_

At the very top of Mama's closet is her soft velvet dress, her very favourite, and sometimes she crawls in there to hold it, because it still smells like Mama.

_#16 - Ash_

She feels an odd jolt of power, and suddenly there is a huge explosion around her- when the dust finally settles, there is Mama, lying on the floor, her face the colour of ash, and no matter how many times she shakes her, Mama won't wake up.

_#17 - Definition_

There are two little girls outside the door, dressed in costumes; they are talking with Abe as she listens at the foot of the stairs, her long glowing hair dangling down her white gown, and one of them says, "We saw your sister at the window - is she supposed to be an angel for Hallowe'en?" and quickly she retreats to her room, deciding to ask Al what an angel is.

_#18 - Staircase_

Their house in Godric's Hollow has a staircase, but she can't stand the heights, ever since that day her mind went blank, heights make her worry she's going to fall over and over again, and never get up.

_#19 - Nail_

It's been a few days since what Mama has been calling her "incident," yet every so often her head again feels like it's being pierced with a nail, and it seems to be that which is making Mama so worried, but it's okay, because Mama can always make everything better.

_#20 - Prey_

Those boys she met in the garden seemed nice, interested in her magic, but then when she couldn't do it again, they got angry, and looked so preditorial that she very nearly screamed, except she was paralyzed with fright.

_#21 - Backwards_

Al read her a story about a wizard named Merlin, and people say he lived life backwards, but she didn't believe it - after all, she wouldn't want to live life backwards, because then she would know what would happen when she was all grown up, and what fun would that be?

_#22 - Trouble_

"Trouble makers," Al grumbles, and she knows that neither he nor Abe will ever let her into the garden again, what with those boys around- but she doesn't understand why, because they seem nice, they said her dress was lovely and she had pretty eyes.

_#23 - Little_

When she was little, before her mind went blank, she had a friend from down the road named Vivian-called-Viv (at least, that's what she said in her mind), and Viv could climb trees like a boy and her dresses were always scratched- she misses Viv when they leave Mould-on-the-Would.

_#24 - Collar_

All day long she wears long, flowing nightgowns, because once Al made her put on a regular dress and it itched her neck so much she cried, so now her brothers make sure her gowns are all without collars, and she is happy.

_#25 - Circle_

She rode a carousel, once, when Mama and Daddy took she and Al and Abe to a carnival- it spun her in circles and made her dizzy, but she laughed and rode it again and again.

_#26 - Hands_

The days that she liked best were the ones when Al brushed out her hair, because even though Abe took care of her in every other way, Al had swift hands that knew how to pull the tangles out without pain, and she thought privately that his wife would love that, one day.

_#27 - Freedom_

The one thing she desires the most is the ability to go wherever she wants, whenever she wants, without the eyes of her brother's following her everywhere.

_#28 - Last_

Daddy is leaving, walking right out the door with his wand in hand- where is going, when her head hurts this much, when she needs him to hold her, and why does she have such a creeping feeling that this is the last time she'll see him?

_#29 - Scab_

Every time she sees that picture of Mama and Daddy on the mantelpiece, Mama looking pretty in her wedding dress and Daddy looking handsome in his dress robes, she gets tears in her eyes, and it makes the old scab of heartache come loose again.

_#30 - Crown_

She wore a crown of daisies in her hair, the day that she was allowed into the garden without her brother's watchful eyes, that day when she made the stems weave together without touching them, that day when those boys made her do it again and again, that day her mind cracked.

_#31 - Time_

Al has been trying to teach her to tell time, but he doesn't realize how hard it for her- the numbers jumble together in her brain and what seems easy for him is the most difficult task for her.

_#32 - Rice_

Mama made the best rice in the world, before she went down into the dirt, and every day she prays Al will make it for dinner like Mama used to- but when he does, it doesn't taste the same, and she is forever disapointed.

_#33 - Worn_

Her old doll is worn, the painted on skin fading, but she keeps it wrapped in a small blanket, nice and safe; it is the only thing she has left from that time before her mind went blank.

_#34 - Paint_

Their sitting room his plain white, the sofa a monotonous brown, and she loves going in there to spin in her long yellow nightgown, so it flounces around her; Abe smiles when she does and tell her she paints the room with colour.

_#35 - Ache_

Everything about her aches; her stomach, her legs, her arms, but most of all her mind, which is pounding with such force she is afraid it will pop right out of her head- will it ever, ever stop?

_#36 - Cherry_

She eats cherries as if they were "going out of style" as Gellert once remarked- how could anyone live without cherries?

_#37 - Library_

Al has so many books it's unbelievable, and she flips through them idly when he's in a good enough mood to let her; Mama used to read to her all the time, but Abe is too busy with chores and Al is too busy with Gellert.

_#38 - Win_

Everyday she finds someone to play jacks with her, though really, Gellert is the only one who stands a chance of winning; her mind may be cracked, but she still has nimble fingers.

_#39 - Loss_

Mama had the softest kisses, with skin that smelled sweet like vanilla; Abe and Al kiss her nicely, but their skin is rough and doesn't smell like vanilla, and she misses Mama so much it makes her heart ache.

_#40 - Fold_

"Fold over, fold under," she whispers, trying again and again to make her hair twist like Mama used to- her fingers get tangled together, and tears form in her eyes; Al waves his wand over her head absently, and as her locks make the braid, she repeats her mantra contentedly: "Fold over, fold under."

_#41 - Music_

She can talk, but only just, simple, childlike words that make Abe look at her sadly, but Al laughs and tells her she has a musical voice, and she should sing one day.

_#42 - Bell_

They gave her a little tinging bell for her thirteenth birthday, and Abe has taught her a song about a star - _twinkle, twinkle, little star - _that she sings with it to please Al, because he said she had a musical voice.

_#43 - Sleep_

She's supposed to be asleep when outside her door, she hears Al and Abe arguing in hushed tones about something called the Deathly Hallows; she thinks that's a bad name and is about to resolve to tell Al that the next morning when sleep overtakes her.

_#44 - Contact_

She's just laying there, on her bed, trying again to make her eyes focus right, even though her beautiful daisy crown keeps floating to the front of her mind, and she's so deep into her fuzzy memory of it that when Mama touches her wrist lightly she screams.

_#45 - Electricity_

Every time Gellert comes to visit she entwines her fingers with his, and fancies that she feels a little jolt whenever their hands meet.

_#46 - Milk_

Mama tells her to fix her own milk, and it's like a test- it's only been a few days since her head stopped pounding, and slowly she reaches for the pitcher- within a second of picking it up, her hands shake so badly she drops it, and she begins to cry; she has never poured her own milk again.

_#47 - Wild_

Al and Abe won't stop calling her a little girl, they just don't understand she hates being little, she wants to grow up; when she cries at them to quit once more, they roll their eyes and Abe pats her head comfortingly, but she rips away, feeling wild, and just to show them she isn't a little girl she goes right up to Gellert and kisses him on the lips.

_#48 - Expectation_

She expects them to punish her after that, but her elder brothers simply stare at her, eyes wide open, and she realizes only now that Gellert had been eating a piece of toast, and she can taste the butter on her lips.

_#49 - Mechanism_

Al once said that the mind is a mechanism, and that hers must be a broken one.

_#50 - Finale_

No matter how many times she screams "Stop!" the curses keep flying, and her hair is falling around her shoulders when that odd purple jet hits her square in the chest; she is falling, so very slowly, and deep in her years-useless mind she knows-

this is the finale.


End file.
